They held a meeting and they said They could no longer tolerate His portrait peering down while they were fed With college food and facts that led to hate; Quite frankly, there’d be no debate – And as to motive, there would be no mystery; They wouldn’t burn it, but they’d put it in [...]
They are the most attentive pair, Their senses constantly on the alert For verbal faux pas; and because they care, They will most violently assert Their right to random remonstrations if their feelings hurt; Providing you behave, they are the friendliest of folk – But always at the ready with opinions pert; Because they [...]
They wanted the whole world to be A fairer place for big and small; In line with this, embraced Modernity And even when the novelty began to pall – To give them credit – never ceased to call For equal outcomes, and to bat Away the critics of ‘one size fits all’; It wasn’t [...]
She is the subject of her Art, Her history is dark and drear, Her brutalistic installations chart Her violent upbringing; year by year They recapitulate events severe; At every autobiographic stage They wring a sympathetic tear; She is The Flower of the Modern Age. In exhibitions she will play her part, Photographers cannot get near; [...]
He’d had that thing for years – some dreadful woe – I can’t remember what it’s called – I guess he’d had enough, although I don’t know all the details. Was he bald? I haven’t seen him for a while; he crawled Into the doctor’s once, all short of breath; I would have helped [...]
They talked about planned parenthood; I thought it sounded A-okay; Had such a wholesome ring—it sounded good— Until I saw that clip today On YouTube, and the world turned grey; I may be hard of hearing, and my wits are slow— Could be mistaken—but they say— They trade in body parts, you know. [...]
All those who find it hard to deal With modern life and get perplexed With innovation technological; who feel Their memory receding with their hairline and will get quite vexed If they can’t get a word, can’t find their specs; With crinkled faces and with balding pate; They cannot even send a text: They’re getting [...]
She got an Oscar for her role In Downton Abbey; and she played the Queen In that biopic with Sir Andrew Foale— You know the one I mean— He’s in that ad for Windolene; Her acting gave us so much pleasure: Nothing too horrid or obscene; They say she is a National Treasure. [...]
She’s earnest for equality And vigilant for women’s rights; She frowns on all frivolity, Of justice she is keen to scale the heights, And to this end she sat up nights And studied law—you get the gist— And now she’s qualified in slights. They say she is a feminist. […]
They say that we are running out Of everything; if we don’t wean Ourselves from greed, continually flout The laws of Nature—put ourselves in quarantine From Baltimore to Bethnal Green— We’ll crash this Spaceship Earth if we don’t man it, And all become more fit and lean; They say that it will save the [...]
It looks just like a pile of wood Dumped in the middle of the town; They say that it is very good, And might be worth ten thousand pounds— Especially in spacious grounds, Like those of Buffy Bagshott, Bart; They say that it will do the rounds; They say that it is Modern Art. [...]
He’s first to claim his faith’s a spur To politics—but in the cause of modern life As seen by a minority of folks who stir The democratic pot to greater strife, For whom the wooden spoon too oft becomes a knife; His faith’s a compass, but it’s not politic To follow it where secularism’s [...]